Jason is wearing a size Large. He is 6' 3" and 210 lbs.
Jason is wearing a size Large. He is 6' 3" and 210 lbs. Click to view our sizing chart

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It's About To Get Weird

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So why the heck did we make this?

Look, I don't wanna freak you out. I know this is all pretty exciting stuff. Me, Vincent van Gogh, with my emphatic brushwork and striking use of color. No doubt I've got this Post-Impressionist thing nailed. But I just want to give you a heads up, it's about to get weird in here. Like, weird weird. I'm talkin' "cut your ear off, wrap it in newspaper and hand it to a woman" kind of weird.

I can't say exactly when it's gonna get weird. But trust me, it's gonna get weird. Like, "Hey, check out that skull smoking a cigarette" type of weird.

And is it any wonder I go a little whacko now and then? I mean sure, now my paintings routinely sell for tens of millions of dollars. But do you know what they were worth when I was alive? Jack. Friggin'. Squat. Seriously, I couldn't give this stuff away when I was alive. But no, thanks for all the wealth and recognition now that I'm dead and gone.

Well, since you're staying, you want some absinthe?

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