Never Nude
USD $28.00
Unisex 100% Cotton T-Shirt
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🧐 When you order this shirt, we print one just for you. Usually ships next day!
USD $28.00
About this product
Why is David wearing jean cut-offs? In a bizarre development, Michelangelo's David statue was suddenly observed wearing cutoff jean shorts yesterday.
"I came in to start my shift at 7:00 yesterday morning and -- boom -- there they were," said Giovanni Aloisio, a security guard at the Gallery of the Accademia di Belle Arti in Florence. "Looking like a Calvin Klein ad from the early 90s or something."
Museum officials say there is only one explanation. "David" has contracted a rare syndrome called never nude, which renders him unable of ever being completely nude.
"Call it an affliction, call it just plain embarrassment, but that statue ain't never showin' his family jewels to anyone ever again," said museum administrator Francesco Lo Sapio.
He added, "It may sound strange, but there are dozens of others out there with this same condition. Dozens!"
"I came in to start my shift at 7:00 yesterday morning and -- boom -- there they were," said Giovanni Aloisio, a security guard at the Gallery of the Accademia di Belle Arti in Florence. "Looking like a Calvin Klein ad from the early 90s or something."
Museum officials say there is only one explanation. "David" has contracted a rare syndrome called never nude, which renders him unable of ever being completely nude.
"Call it an affliction, call it just plain embarrassment, but that statue ain't never showin' his family jewels to anyone ever again," said museum administrator Francesco Lo Sapio.
He added, "It may sound strange, but there are dozens of others out there with this same condition. Dozens!"
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The Details
Product Type Unisex 100% Cotton T-Shirt
Neckline Crew Neck
Fit Fitted: Not Too Baggy, Not Too Tight. For a baggy fit, order a size up.
Fabric Content 100% Cotton, Sewn in Honduras, Digitally printed in USA
Sizing
S | M | L | XL | 2X | 3X | |
Chest | 34-36" | 37-41" | 42-44" | 45-47" | 48-51" | 53-56" |
Length | 28.5" | 29.5" | 30.5" | 31.5" | 32.5" | 33.5" |
*Length measured from garment when it is laid flat
Designed by Us, From Scratch
Digitally Printed with State-of-the Art Technology
Made From the Softest 100% Cotton Fabric
Finished With an Interior Neck Print Instead of a Tag
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Never Nude
Unisex 100% Cotton T-Shirt