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Who's your favorite hick superhero? Introducing a new superhero... Captain ‘Merica! He’s just as good as the “other” captain, with a few nuances:
The other captain was given a serum that made him a “super soldier,” enhancing all of his functions to the peak of human ability. Captain ‘Merica is known to drink other people’s “wounded soldiers” (unfinished beers), which has given him a superhuman tolerance for Busch Lite.
The other captain has mastered all manner of martial arts and combined them into a unique style of hand-to-hand combat. Captain ‘Merica lost several of his teeth in a fist fight with the waiter at Bennigan’s.
The other captain’s weapon is a shield made of a super-strong alloy that has never been duplicated. Captain ‘Merica’s weapon is a trashcan lid that he uses to chase away racoons, ex-wives and debt collectors.
The other captain defeated Nazi Germany to make the world safe for democracy. Captain ‘Merica doesn’t own a passport.
Catchphrases: “Avengers, unite!” vs. “Business in front, party in the back.”
The other captain was given a serum that made him a “super soldier,” enhancing all of his functions to the peak of human ability. Captain ‘Merica is known to drink other people’s “wounded soldiers” (unfinished beers), which has given him a superhuman tolerance for Busch Lite.
The other captain has mastered all manner of martial arts and combined them into a unique style of hand-to-hand combat. Captain ‘Merica lost several of his teeth in a fist fight with the waiter at Bennigan’s.
The other captain’s weapon is a shield made of a super-strong alloy that has never been duplicated. Captain ‘Merica’s weapon is a trashcan lid that he uses to chase away racoons, ex-wives and debt collectors.
The other captain defeated Nazi Germany to make the world safe for democracy. Captain ‘Merica doesn’t own a passport.
Catchphrases: “Avengers, unite!” vs. “Business in front, party in the back.”
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