Cash Only

USD $28.00
USD $28.00

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NOTE: This product is made to order and cannot be returned or exchanged. Allow 13-17 business days for production. Due to slowdowns surrounding COVID-19 precautions production delays may occur. Certain discounts and offers cannot be applied.
USD $28.00
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About this product

Got any friends that are always a little low on cash? OK guys, thanks for a fun weekend. Before you go, remember that you all owe me for the cabin, so please pony up. Cash only, please. No, Derrick, I don't accept personal checks. Why? Because they're a pain in the ass, and also because you belong to that weird credit union with the golf ball logo and I just don't trust it.

No, Jen, please don't PayPal me. Last time you did that I had to remind you 40 times, and then you forgot to select the "personal gift" option so I got charged a fee. Guys, seriously, you need to bring cash.

Dude, Josh, what the hell is this? A gift card? Are you kidding me? I don't care if it's accepted at any Loews AMC Cineplex nationwide. You know what's accepted everywhere? Actual freakin' money. I can't pay the rent with a movie gift card.

Andre, before you even start, I'm not going to trade for another one of your glass sculptures. This isn't Burningman, dude, this is real life.

OK, that's it. Next year one of you deadbeats can plan the trip.

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The Details

Product Type On Demand Unisex T-Shirt *NOTE: On Demand products are made to order and cannot be returned or exchanged.

Neckline Crew Neck

Fit Fitted: Not Too Baggy, Not Too Tight. For a baggy fit, order a size up.

Fabric Content 100% Cotton, Sewn in Honduras, Digitally printed in USA



*Length measured from garment when it is laid flat

Designed by Us, From Scratch

Digitally Printed with State-of-the Art Technology

Made From the Softest 100% Cotton Fabric

Finished With an Interior Neck Print Instead of a Tag


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HEADLINE has been making intelligently funny tees and apparel from San Francisco since 2004. Back then, George W. Bush was president, gas cost $2, and t-shirts were called “torso shorts.” (Citation needed.) Over 10 years and millions of t-shirts later, we still have the same mission: to create fun, premium apparel that leaves an impression.