Goose Ness Monster
USD $28.00
Unisex 100% Cotton T-Shirt
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NOTE: This product is made to order and cannot be returned or exchanged. Allow 13-17 business days for production. Due to slowdowns surrounding COVID-19 precautions production delays may occur. Certain discounts and offers cannot be applied.
USD $28.00
About this product
Never heard of the Goose Ness Monster? Over the years, myriad theories have been put forth to explain the Loch Ness Monster. Some say Nessie is an ancient plesiosaur that survived extinction. Others say she's simply an overgrown eel. And still others contend that she is Tupac's killer. (That last one's kind of a fringe theory.)
But we think we may have solved the mystery of Nessie once and for all. Using advanced photo-enhancement technology, we have determined that the Loch Ness Monster is, in fact, a goose. And not just any goose. A goose that is estimated to be up to 23 feet long, with webbed feet the size of bicycle tires and a wingspan longer that a Boeing 747.
So why has no one seen this massive "Goose Ness Monster" flying or swimming? Our best guess is that it is a special "submarine" goose that lives under water most of the time and only peaks up occasionally to feed. Scientists believe its diet consists of aquatic vegetation, as well as incredibly large pieces of white bread tossed in the Loch by old ladies.
But we think we may have solved the mystery of Nessie once and for all. Using advanced photo-enhancement technology, we have determined that the Loch Ness Monster is, in fact, a goose. And not just any goose. A goose that is estimated to be up to 23 feet long, with webbed feet the size of bicycle tires and a wingspan longer that a Boeing 747.
So why has no one seen this massive "Goose Ness Monster" flying or swimming? Our best guess is that it is a special "submarine" goose that lives under water most of the time and only peaks up occasionally to feed. Scientists believe its diet consists of aquatic vegetation, as well as incredibly large pieces of white bread tossed in the Loch by old ladies.
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The Details
Product Type On Demand Unisex T-Shirt *NOTE: On Demand products are made to order and cannot be returned or exchanged.
Neckline Crew Neck
Fit Fitted: Not Too Baggy, Not Too Tight. For a baggy fit, order a size up.
Fabric Content 100% Cotton, Sewn in Honduras, Digitally printed in USA
Sizing
| S | M | L | XL | 2X | 3X | |
| Chest | 34-36" | 37-41" | 42-44" | 45-47" | 48-51" | 53-56" |
| Length | 28.5" | 29.5" | 30.5" | 31.5" | 32.5" | 33.5" |
*Length measured from garment when it is laid flat
Designed by Us, From Scratch
Digitally Printed with State-of-the Art Technology
Made From the Softest 100% Cotton Fabric
Finished With an Interior Neck Print Instead of a Tag
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Goose Ness Monster
Unisex 100% Cotton T-Shirt
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