I Went to A Dinosaur Theme Park
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About this product
I had a pretty weird weekend. I was invited by this old guy to tour his new theme park. Sounds OK (if a bit creepy) so far. Just wait cuz here's the kicker: They had real dinosaurs at this park. I'm not talking about some low-rent natural-history-museum diarama of dinosaurs. Nope. Like, actual, living dinosaurs. T-Rexes, brontosauruses — you name it. No idea how they pulled this off. (Some s--t about DNA from ancient mosquitoes trapped in tree sap. I kind of dozed off during the explanation tbh.)
Anyways, sounds great, right? Yeah — for like the first hour. Then the power went out, and s--t started going hella sideways. Pretty much all dinosaurs got loose and started hunting us. (In case you ever wondered if dinosaurs would eat people, they do.) By my count, at least five people died. (Though unfortunately neither of the annoying kids who were there with me.) And, oh by the way, it was pouring rain at this point.
Long story, I made it out alive. But by the time it was all said and done, even the owner of the park was like "yeah this was a dumb idea." So I probably won't be going back, unless there's like a really good Groupon or something.
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The Details
Product Type Unisex 100% Cotton T-Shirt
Neckline Crew Neck
Fit Fitted: Not Too Baggy, Not Too Tight. For a baggy fit, order a size up.
Fabric Content 100% Cotton, Sewn in Honduras, Digitally printed in USA
Sizing
S | M | L | XL | 2X | 3X | |
Chest | 34-36" | 37-41" | 42-44" | 45-47" | 48-51" | 53-56" |
Length | 28.5" | 29.5" | 30.5" | 31.5" | 32.5" | 33.5" |
*Length measured from garment when it is laid flat

Designed by Us, From Scratch

Digitally Printed with State-of-the Art Technology

Made From the Softest 100% Cotton Fabric

Finished With an Interior Neck Print Instead of a Tag
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I Went to A Dinosaur Theme Park

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